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‘House of Gucci’ is yet another extremely long biopic made just because Hollywood could

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(Photo Courtesy of House of Gucci Official Website)

By Abigail Mulonas

The cold truth of “House of Gucci” is that it is a long and unaccomplished story full of fluff. 

When Patrizia Reggiani, an outsider from humble beginnings, marries into the Gucci family, her unbridled ambition begins to unravel their legacy and triggers a reckless spiral of betrayal, decadence, revenge, and murder. 

Lady Gaga leads the cast as Patrizia. The cast continues with Adam Driver as Maurizio Gucci, Al Pacino as Aldo Gucci, Jared Leto as Paolo Gucci, Jeremy Irons as Rodolfo Gucci, and Salma Hayek as Pina Auriemma. The film is directed by Ridley Scott. 

Given the entire production plays its cards to showcase the highly acclaimed cast, it makes it hurt more when the only thing impressive are their dedicated Italian accents. 

These plain performances are the biggest washout.

We deserved more from each decorated individual, but no one was on the same plane. These performances were not atrocious, which is important to note. Rather, they were merely fine, and that’s the disappointing thing. 

Getting the bare minimum from both leads, Gaga and Driver didn’t bring each other up, they simply just co-lived on screen.  They didn’t have the inner-connection that could have taken this screenplay from words on paper to the liveliness you feel in your bones. They worked cold and separately; they were distant from each other.

Jared Leto, contrarily, while his dedication was overblown in a performance that’s too much to handle, his effort was there. Though completely unfitting and not on the same page as his co-stars, his exaggeration showed he is arguably the only person that seemed to take his work seriously. 

The rest of the cast varies from feeling like a high school play to the first time any of them had read their lines.

Yet, this recurring feeling I get after big box office films makes me sound like a broken record. Sometimes films are bad because of the lack of effort, but this one just didn’t need to be made in the first place. You can only fabricate so much substance before there’s nothing left. 

While I love a good biopic, especially one on a family I know little about, this left me feeling empty. Still knowing little about the family I just watched over two hours of, I don’t feel a persuasion to lean toward either side of their conflicts. 

It is not this film’s fault it was poorly produced, as it’s a victim of the recent wave of unneeded and underdeveloped Hollywood biopics with A-list stars that don’t have the maturity to take itself seriously. 

What could have been definitive and powerful resulted in an experience that’s too easily forgotten. It makes you check your watch one too many times, and it’s greatest sin was that it was ambitious, but actually quite average. There are worse films than this, surely, but this isn’t one to be remembered. 

Diving into every moment with a different mindset, the tone never reached a consistent pace. Multiple portions of the story transition to be unconnected, and the relevance of the entire production gets dismissed by its own doing. 

The bottom line is that “House of Gucci” doesn’t create a much needed world to live in, thus resulting in a progression that tests the patience of the audience. 

Rating: 5/10